Monday, June 23, 2014
5 questions with "The Laws of Charisma" author Kurt W. Mortensen
Do you have any tips on how you can try and feel and radiate confidence when you're not really confident?
Lack of confidence can be summed up in one word: fear. Fear can be defined as a magnified doubt. All worries, questions, concerns, insecurities—can ultimately be traced back to fear in one form or another. Fear breeds doubt and doubt destroys confidence. You need to make sure that your confidence is bigger than your doubt. What does your audience really sense in you? Are you afraid to exercise confidence and charisma? The desire to overcome your fear needs to be bigger than the fear itself. When you are afraid, that fear will breed doubt and suck the energy right out of you. While it is okay to have fear, you must be able to handle and manage that fear. When you doubt yourself, doubt your abilities, others will doubt you and your charisma.
For people who are not very charismatic at all, what's a good easy way to get the ball rolling?
The challenge is that most think of charismatic people as movie stars, CEO’s, politicians, or even religious leaders. Sure we born with a few of the skills, but the studies show charisma can be learned. Remember with charisma that people want to be around you and be influenced by you. I would have an honest moment with yourself and choose the one area that is causing people not to want be around you or influenced by you. Find others in the workplace that that have that skill you want and watch how they use it with others.
Who is the most charismatic person you've met and what specifically made him or her so charismatic?
When I think of charisma, I think of Anthony Robbins. He is the author of Unlimited Power and made famous by having everyone in his audience walk on fire. You probably have seen him on an infomercial promoting personal development programs. Stop and watch him and you will see the definition of energy and charisma. He can engage an audience for 4 straight days and those events will last very late into the evening. He is so powerful, engaging and charismatic that his audience does not realize they have been with Tony for over 12 hours. His transfer of vision and hope cause him to be charismatic.
What is the biggest breakthrough you've made in your life in terms of getting to the next level of charisma?
My biggest breakthrough during my life was the ability to influence others. We all influence for a living and need to make sure we have mastered this skill. I learned that the ability to influence others how they want to be influenced was a critical factor not only to success, but with charisma. Long gone are the days of force, the data dump, closing skills and hype. People are more skeptical than ever before and if you don’t know how to influence the right way – there will be no charisma.
Out of the Four Core Qualities of Charismatic People, which one is most difficult to master for the vast majority of people?
The most difficult charismatic quality for most people to master is the ability to communicate and present their ideas. Yes, this would be your presentation skills. The studies show that the ability to give presentations is the most critical skill needed to move up in today’s business environment. Charismatic people have excellent communication skills that captive, inspire and rivet the audience. They can articulate their vision and make that vision come alive in the audience’s mind. Communication includes phone skills, face-to-face interactions, group presentations, negotiations, and even text and email. How are your presentation skills?